Things change. Life gets better.

On those days when you think things couldn't possibly get any worse, they often improve a thousandfold. When you're convinced that no one will care for you again, you find out someone could. When you wonder if you will ever be really happy and able to relax again, you find a person who calms you. Whose very existence brings a smile to your face. Granted, you don't hope for a lot, or plan for anything, or expect to get anywhere with it. But briefly, ever so briefly, you can entertain the thought that you will have your life reach some level of normalcy again. The clouds part in spite of the rain. The prospect of hope returns. You acknowledge that there is a sanctuary in the storm. And while you don't know where life will lead you next, you're able to move on, just happy to be alive for a while. No expectations. No promises. Just content with the way things are as long as it lasts. Comfort at last. Kindness. Affection. All smiles and giggles. Feeling giddy again, remembering simpler times. The pain will return, but not for long and not as strong, because you know that there is someone there to help absorb the shock. Someone who cares, and isn't afraid to say so. Someone who also doesn't expect or want any more than is currently available. Who also hopes. Who knows the responsibilities and the pressures and difficulties. You've found a kindred spirit who is happy to share part of the path with you, enjoying without pushing, considerate of situations, and simply glad for the opportunity to be there.

That's where I am.

And it feels really good.

Happy Birthday To Me

It's my birthday today.

I'm 35.

I had different plans at different points over the last few weeks. None of them quite worked out.

But the day turned out okay as a whole. Did a little shopping. Had a nice lunch at the Grand Rapids Brewing Co. Then went out and bought new clothes for me.

Going out tonight with some friends. Should be a good time. We'll see.

The highlights of my day - my 9yo daughter calling me to wish me a happy birthday - texting Adam during my lunch so I didn't feel quite so alone - getting a laugh out of one of the co-managers at the store - and getting an e-mail message from my credit union wishing me a happy birthday.

Tomorrow I shall relay highlights of the evening part of my birthday.

See you then.